I’m afraid it’s not possible to answer this question since it depends on the use case. What you should bear in mind is that texture resolutions which work fine on desktop do not necessarily work on mobile platforms since memory and bandwidth are way more restricted.
Ideally, you do both. Merge meshes or use instanced rendering but also try to use compressed textures with potentially lower resolution.
I do not recommend to manually compute such metrics since the results are often wrong and thus misleading. Better to monitor the memory allocation with the browser’s dev tools.
Again, that depends and without seeing your app it’s not possible to tell. It’s best if you keep draw calls on a minimum and try to optimize textures as good as possible. Especially texture compression is an underrated feature.
Using glTF can actually help to achieve such things since there are many ways and workflows to optimize assets: Imported Model Size and Performance - #3 by donmccurdy